Voicemail and Cowboys

Fairfax, California: A former client (of my voicemail company) asked about current rates. After I'd quoted prices, he wanted them cheaper, which I declined simply as unprofitable.

His email today said: "I can understand your rationale that they are not profit-generating packages, but at the same time, aren't they pretty minimal to maintain? What's wrong with a bunch of bread & butter stuff that takes little effort? I could get a $7.95 voicemail from Pacific Bell for less."

He's not counted his costs. For the PacBell home voicemail, he must provide the phone line. Including the phone line cost, the PacBell voicemail costs $31 monthly, lots more than ours at $9 to $13.50 which includes the phone line.

But the interesting part is his suggestion to run "Bread and Butter" accounts, even if they are not profitable. I'd ask: how much butter would zero money buy?

To me, that seems like no bread, no butter.

I am reminded of the two cowboys who decided to make some money. They'd buy produce from the farmers, carry it to the town square on Saturday, and sell it from the back of their pickup truck. They did so, that first Saturday, and sold all the produce. The only problem was that they sold it for the same price they bought it. Adding up their profits at the end of the day, there were none.

"Well," said one to the other, "We're just going to have to get a bigger truck."

Writing a Symphony

Austria, 1743: A young man wrote to Mozart and said: "Herr Mozart, I am thinking of writing symphonies. Can you give me any suggestions as to how to get started?"

Mozart responded, "A symphony is a very complex musical form, perhaps you should begin with some simple lieder and work your way up to a symphony."

"But Herr Mozart," the young man said, "you were writing symphonies when you were 8 years old."

"Well, yes," Mozart replied, "But I never asked anybody how."